What I have discovered is that I can have a tendency to become emotionally dependent on people until it not only drains them but myself. Not something I do intentionally, in fact I don't realise that I am doing it, until I look back. I guess I am just as needy as the next person. Because it sure is nice to feel wanted and cherished eh.
Have I been a very good friend to you ? Have you mastered the art of being a good friend ? Can you let me in on the secret.
Much of the past week I have been contemplating just what the secret is. What lesson I can learn from past experiences. How I can grow and what changes I need to make within myself. Quite the little eye opener of a task really, and I still have not discovered the secret.
By the way when I say secret, I am not talking about that new movie that everyone is intent on watching. I know that secret, and I hardly think it's such a big secret either. The principles talked about in that movie we have been taught since primary. I guess sometimes we just need other parties to point that secret out to us, for it to stick.
No no, the secret I am talking about is how to be a good friend and how to maintain lasting friendships. Sure would be handy to know that one.
So yesterday I went on a quest. A quest to photograph. I spent all day travelling this beautiful city. I saw many wonderful sights. When it came to photograph them though, I could not fit what I saw into my lens cap. My friend Abigail is a photographer in the works. Her pictures seem to encapsure a story. Every one of her pictures speak volumes to me. They are not just pictures, they are tales. You look at them and wonder and imagine where that picture came from and what was happening when it was taken and what will happen after. I'd like to be that sort of a photographer.
The best I could come up with was a picture of my dad's grave. I haven't been out there as much in the past few years. But the past few weeks I have visited a couple of times. It struck me how long he has been dead. It still seems like yesterday and I still miss him as much as I did yesterday as I did over a decade ago. So I'll post the only pictures I took. I hope you don't find it morbid. I actually enjoy visiting cemetries. They are like Abigails photographs, the stories from the graves resonnate to me. I wonder about these people laid to rest, their lives, their stories, what they are doing now.
I tried to get the reflections in this photo of the flowers on the next grave. There is so much life at a gravesite. Well at this particular cemetery. It's in the country, the closest cemetery that we could find that reminded us of New Zealand. We thought it a fitting area for dad to be buried.
5 comments:
Wow, that post brought tears to my eyes Trudy. Thank you for your comments on my work, and you know what, you captured the very essence of photography for me that I have not being able to put into words when I've been asked why I have come to love the camera and photography so much "They are not just pictures, they are tales" A photograph is a 'moment' captured, an event encapsulated, a life made real and remembered. I think that is why your photograph of your father's grave was the only photograph you feel was ‘right’ It was a story for you of a man, your father, who held you in his heart and who you have held in yours. You remember, you feel and you wonder. That to me is what photography is all about, a story with no words.
I think that is why the type of photography I feel most drawn too is of people.
There is a song by Harry Chapin which has the worlds “when a city holds the one you love it takes on a different face” I wonder how different your photo’s might have been with the people aspect involved.
The secret – watching the actual movie was an ‘ah huh’ moment for me, it was the Saviors message to me, it was the essence of gospel living – I thought. Mike watched the same movie and saw nothing of Christ and the gospel in it. Amazing how different our souls see things.
As for the secret of friendship, that is a tricky one. I think we are all a work in progress, we are all learning but it seems to me that again Christ provides the example of friendship better than any of us. Stand up for what is right, be true to what we believe in, be there for the other person, bear up their burdens, forgive, take time, laugh, love, party, be happy for them, be excited in their talents and carry them from time to time BUT true friendship is also letting the other person do the same for you.
Trudy, we have never met, I count you as a wonderful friend because you have been there for me at some of my darkest moments, you have reminded me of the goodness in myself, you have reminded me of the Saviors love, and you have challenged me to be better and allowed me to do the same for you.
I think you are doing better than you think. But the process of assessment is good for us also.
PS, where is the photo?
duh, knew I forgot something.
Thanks for those thoughts Abi. And yes one day we will have to meet and let this friendship that we have fostered over the years become even more real. It's interesting how with the advancement of technology we can make friends from all over the world, without ever meeting them. Maybe our friendship started before we came to earth and once again will flourish after eh ? I know that I for one am very grateful for a few handful of people I have come to know through the online world, and who's thoughts and friendships I cherish just as much as those fostered here in what is known as the 'real world'.
ps .. Saviors ? ;-)
I think those photos are perfect, exactly the kind of photography that is the story being told. I love all the trees in the background. It looks like a very peaceful spot.
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